Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Who shrank that shirt!!!!!!!!!!

When it comes to being skinny, I have the worst genes. I smell food and I get fat. I have been on a diet as far as I can remember and when looking back at my childhood I always think about the dysfunctional relationship that my entire family has with food. When I was ten, I went to the nutritionist for the first time. That’s when they found out I had high cholesterol…yes at 10. My brother and I went to about three of them afterwards so I consider myself pretty knowledgeable when it comes to the number of calories in food, how much fat, and sodium blab la bla.  That whole experience has ruined food for me forever. Food to me = getting fat. There have been times in my life when try not to care and eat whatever I want, but most of the time I feel really guilty about it afterwards. Is awful….but oh well, it is what it is.
The reason I bring this up is because being on a diet is not big deal for me. I’ve done it all my life. Fat every couple of years, anorexic the next one, super fit after, back to chubby……I am not surprised when I try on a pair of jeans that I haven’t worn in a while and I realize that they don’t longer fit me . It sucks buts its happened to me so many times I’ve almost come to expect it every couple of years…anyway that is why it was so funny for me to see the face of somebody who gets to experience this for the very first time in their lives: “What the hell is going on! This shirt is new, did you shrink it when you washed it???!! Why does it fit so tight????!!!!”…oh yes, poor little P (or should I say not so little anymore hahahaha!!!!!!!!)
When it comes to food, my husband is one of those annoying “normal” people who has never had to deal with his weight, eats when is hungry and stops when he is full. Most of the times when I tell him: “hey, let’s go eat ice cream!” His reply is: “no thanks, I am not hungry.” I am not hungry??????!!!!!!!!!!!! I am not hungry??????!!!!!!!!!! What does that have to do with anything!!! IS ICE CREAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMM, U DON’T HAVE TO BE HUNGRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.
The first time I took him home for dinner with my family, my mom kept on asking him if he didn’t like the food. We were all done eating and he was still not half way finished. His reply: No, is great, I just eat at normal speed (unlike you crazy people who devour everything in 5 seconds). He is full, he stops, even if there is one bite left on the plate…when that happens guess who ends up picking it up with the fork (hey there are kids starving in Africa). The first time we went to IHOP he got up to go to the bathroom and when he came back his remaining pancake was gone, he was crashed as he had been saving the middle part (the best part according to him) for last.  WHO GOES TO THE BATHROOM UNLESS THEY ARE DONE EATING!!!!!!!!!! I’m sorry; I thought you were finished dude! I wasn’t going to let the waitress take it…plus the middle part looked extra delicious!....yeah I ate it.
A few weeks ago we were getting ready to go out with our friends and the shirt incident occurred. His face was priceless. I’ll be honest; I kind of felt a little joy inside when I witnessed this, especially because I happen to be going through a skinny year. Yes, I admit it I am jealous of those no –work, no-effort skinny people, so I do get some satisfaction when they finally get a taste of my life long agony…..even when it is my own husband (I know I am horrible, but honest)
So like most beginner weight gainers, P attributed this incident to clothing shrinkage or perhaps being a bit bloated or whatever excuse would serve as a denial. But one can’t live in denial forever, because it wasn’t just the one shirt, it was also a couple of jeans and pants….and oh yeah my constant mocking probably didn’t help either. This whole situation led to something I never thought I would hear in my entire life. P declared this weekend: “Honey, my belly is getting gross, I think I need to cut back on the beer. From now on I will only drink it on the weekends”……WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT did I hear correctly??? So yeah, he hasn’t drank beer at all this week and we actually went for a run together yesterday after work (he decided not to wear socks and got blisters all over but that is another funny story for another funny blog). It was awesome!  We plan on running three times a week together from now on and maybe doing some other workouts here and there. I am excited!!!!!!!!!!
This means no more mocking from now on, only encouragement and motivation . After all I know how much is sucks to struggle with weight and I don’t really want P to have to go through that. I rather have him hot looking, happy, “normal” and fit, just like I’m used to.


  1. This was the best post ever. Very sweet.

    I love reading about this kind of encouragement of loved one.

    1. Thank you Leroy, I really appreciate your comments and fed back. I am glad you liked it, I will try to keep it up